Life

It occurs to me that I am not expected to come up with exciting content for this space like I am everywhere else I have to write, but that most of my “readers” (all 3 of you – thanks Mom!) are simply checking in to hear what I’m up to, have a little laugh at my expense, and be able to take a breather from the important Facebook surfing we all do.  Yes, admit it, you do it, too.

So here’s what I’ve been up to, in handy bite-sized bullets that you can enjoy while you watch TV:

• writing zombie Haikus with my new fridge magnet set.  The Captain bought me a set of 200 magnetized words about zombies earlier this week, and I have spent an astounding amount of time composing ridiculous 17-syllable poems about flesh eating chases.  It’s fun.  Over the past year, I have become quite nearly obsessed with impending zombie apocalypses (even though, for the life of me, I can NOT pronounce that word without sounding like I am making a bowl of popcorn in my mouth)  And I haven’t even attempted to do so after a couple of glasses of wine.  Yet.  In any case, zombies are things I think about, so much so that I am considering talking to my landlord about the lack of escape options from my apartment, particularly if they are the fast-moving sort.  Forget being able to escape from a fire, I am not interested in becoming zombie food.
• not running as much as I should be.  My right knee is, oh, a bit screwed.  I am downing glucosamine-whatever like Pez, I rested, I stretch, I ice, I rub, I whine, I wine.  It doesn’t feel nice, and I’m guessing that in a few weeks that 42k won’t, either, but I persevere.  Even if I have to half-crawl that marathon, I will do it.  It will make for a crazy improvement in my PB on my NEXT one, so it’s all good.  I am still gathering donations, and will be until May 30th (perhaps some of you need to know I have finished the damn thing before handing over your cash).  Please contact me and I will take your money.  The offer still stands that if you gather TEN donations for me (you might know richer people than I do) that I WILL TAKE YOU OUT FOR DINNER. See?  I’m awesome that way.
• hanging out with The Captain.  I will post photos when I think to find the cord, download them to my computer etc, etc, but suffice it to say, I am dating Dress-Up Guy.  He has outfits that he plans and executes and orders pieces for, and while all this is a little foreign to me, it’s fun to see what he comes up with.  The latest addition is a kilt in his family tartan, and I must say it looks FAB.  We’ve been getting up to all sorts of things and it’s all Fun and Games and Eating.  He’s also brought out some sort of fashionista in ME, and that’s been fun to explore, as well.
• embracing being a Dog Mummy.  Yes, I have been Baxter’s Mum for nearly 7 years, but now that it’s pretty much the 2 of us as a constant, our closeness has reached a new level that I quite like.  I can’t even explain how much I love that little dude.  I tell him every night (as I get on his pillow with him for a good-night belly rub) that I love him the most; that no one in the whole world loves him more than I do.  This little ritual is special to both of us.  Others are free to love him, but no one ever will more than me.
• coaching.  Certification is coming, I have a small roster of clients lined up, and I feel like I’m hitting some kind of groove. Sure, my website STILL isn’t finished, but I am realizing that maybe that doesn’t matter as much as I think, although, let’s be clear, it will be done at some point prior to June 1.
• getting rich.  I now have a Financial Planner, her name is Connor Brodie (just ASK me how awesome she is and I will talk and talk for days!), and she has drawn up a money plan for me that has me downright excited and saving surprisingly little as I get my coaching practice off the ground (PHEW!  I hate saving!)  As someone who doesn’t think about this stuff beyond just wanting to know I have Enough, I am suddenly very Invested (pun totally intended) in my financial future.  I thought I would have to have High Finance already in order for someone like Connor to help me, but that wasn’t so – she handles whatever money stuff you’ve got (or don’t). She and I are planning a VERY expensive trip to Italy in a few years, to which we’ve both allocated FIVE FIGURES for shopping.  For shoes.  And really good pizza.  We both plan to power-diet before stepping on the plan so as to be at a size deficit.  We have a plan.  See?  Amazing.
• not cooking.  I still manage to make eggs, but I leave a lot of the cooking to The Captain, even when he is in my kitchen at 10:30 making (yummy) soft tacos and it seems way to late to eat.  I do okay at filling the food hole, so you need not worry, I am not about to fade away to nothing.  Unlike Baxter, who would have you believe that he is deprived and starved and beaten and that you should immediately call the SPCA on his behalf.  Trust me.  He eats JUST fine.

If you think I am leading an ultra-exciting-hold-on-to-your-panties life here, you might be a little off.  I’m just live a life.  It’s big, and I love it, but it’s pretty level and even and perfect.  Finally.

Have a great weekend.  Let me know what you’ve been up to.  Send me your donations.

On goals and Lady Gaga

Four things are on the agenda for today – chomp in:

• Back in the fall, when my marriage hadn’t quite had its plug pulled, I set a goal for myself to cut down on my Day Job hours by January in order to be able to spend dedicated time each week on my coaching practice.  Well, it’s March, but it’s happened.  I have been able to make it so I can take some time each week to work on that part of my life, and still make enough to pay for Baxter and I to eat.  It’s a corner I was very happy to turn, and you can expect some big things to be coming outa this little coach.  I talk about balance with my clients a lot, and it sometimes seems like the brass ring we all reach and reach for, but I finally feel like I have a bit more of it.  See that?  It’s the grin on my face.
• I don’t understand Lady Gaga.  Or is it Man Gaga?  I hear rumors, I see beautiful photos, and I see photos that make me recoil.  Last summer, I thought she looked like someone I knew, which is to say I thought she was fairly attractive, but now?  Whoa.  I actually saw a bus shelter ad featuring her (?) and felt a little ill.  At the same time, the person I thought she looked like has grown less attractive to me (some people become less beautiful to me when I see them carrying on in ways that aren’t flattering to them)(I hate watching women sell out and try to become someone they’re not in hopes of getting something they want)   In any case,  I’m not convinced Gaga was the most sane person to begin with; I read an article with her (Rolling Stone?) and had to constantly re-read paragraphs to even get a general idea of what she was talking about.  It was like having a conversation with a crazy person on a bus.  I’m not sure what machinery there is at work there.  Bottom line, while I like to run to Lady Gaga songs (with the exception of her newest one), that is where the admiration ends.
• I am in love with my 5-year Journal It’s a nifty thing: 1 page per day of the year (including Leapyear), separated into 5 years per page.  There are about 5 lines to write for each day, then you go to the next page for the next day and so on.  I love it because it makes me be brief. I don’t get mired in the pressure of being brilliant and poetic.  I am simply leaving behind some words about this day so that a year from now, I will remember the big idea I had, the shitty day I survived, the moments I had.  It can be used to record what you’re grateful for, what you did, what you accomplished, or whatever you wish.  It’s your journal and you get to to be the bosserooni.  Try it.
• I am still in (somewhat lazy) training for my marathon (all part of finding this elusive balance I speak about), but it is coming along.  I am allowing for the possibility that simply finishing the marathon will be enough; I have a lot of stress and things in the air, and I seem to constantly misjudge the impact on my time and energy.  I am still completely and utterly committed to my fundraising goal and have set up a website to collect donations.  PLEASE, PLEASE, pass it along and spread the word.  Special bonus: if you collect 10 donations from your network and hand them over to me, I will TAKE YOU OUT FOR DINNER.  Seriously.  Although it might be soup, I hope that counts as a meal.

So that’s it for today.  See?  I told you I’d be here more often.

 

Ode to New Shoes

I actually have no clue how to write an Ode.  I’m not even certain if I could pick one out of line up.  The last time I remember really hearing the word used was on the Smurfs, I think.  But I digress.

On Monday, I ran for 3 miles before going to Boot Camp, and then yesterday I did the same.  The net result is that my ass was thoroughly kicked, but also that I should have asked a ganster to shoot me in the shins, as that would likely hurt less today.

I have been complaining about my shoes, a pair of Sauconys I bought in Vegas last August, for a few weeks.  Whining, in fact, about their discomfort and my fear that I would be injured.  The Husband just scoffed and insisted that they couldn’t *possibly* be dead already.  Well, I’m here to announce to the world that they are.

I thought maybe it was my imagination at work, that maybe they were fine, after all, I got them in August and used them to barely train for and eventually run a half marathon, but really, that wasn’t THAT many miles…so today, I have a date at the Runner’s Den to get me some new ones.  I will try to post a photo once I have them in my hot little hands.

As I have massage therapy tonight and am not allowed to work out, I shall have to settle for sporting them about the house tonight and will break them in tomorrow @ Boot Camp.  I just hope I can keep them clean. 

What is most funny to think about in all this is that if I could go back in time and tell the 1993 me that I would be here in 2009 looking forward to getting new shoes to run in, I would not really be able to get a word in edgewise, so loud would the laughter be, in between the shoving of doughnuts into the laugh hole.  Laugh it up, beotch.  We’re back at it.