If you have spent even 40 seconds with me in the past 5 years, you’d know that I have a basset hound, whom I adore. He is turning 5 in eight short weeks, so I thought I would use tonight, dear internet, to wax a little lovin’ about my little buddy.
Dear Baxter,
You have made me laugh every day that I have known you, from the first time we met and you fell into an exhausted sleep on my calf as I knelt on the grass to your daily dramatic perceptions of your little world. You started out a crazy MoFo; playing hard, eating everything in your way, including a package of Advil, a chocolate cake, and one of my favorite shoes. I learnt 2 things from you in those early days: if you were too quiet, there was trouble brewing, and that you have a stomach that must be made of freaking IRON. Wow.
You have evolved into a very delightful creature; you mostly listen to me, you don’t eat stuff off the counters anymore (yes, what a fun time that was), you seem to know when I need a friendly nudge from a wet nose, and you have the sweetest disposition of anyone I know. Humans included.
You are patient like I wish I could be, but at the same time have a one-track mind for what you want when you want it, which is something I have to admire. You wear your big huge heart right on your sleeve, and your feelings are never a mystery. You are happy from the moment you wake up to the moment I tuck you into the kennel at night, and you seem perfectly content to simply be in whichever room we are in, so you can hear our voices, and maybe have a little try of whatever we’re eating. Though happy a lot, you are also very suspicious, and remind me of Stanley from The Office. But it’s cute on you, except when it turns to Stubborn, and you cannot be persuaded to do anything that doesn’t make perfect sense to YOU. I like to pretend I’m Alpha, but your apathy wins most days.
I love that you sleep for about 21 hours of the day, rising only to take care of business, eat, walk, and race about the house with your squeaky chicken in your mouth. I love that in the middle of playing, you will pause, and run to fetch a toy to add to the fun. I love that you are so, so gentle with dogs smaller than you are, and that you are fascinated and utterly respectful of children, even with their erratic movements and loud sounds. I know you desperately want one of your own, but for now you will have to settle with watching them at the park with your tail waving about. You will make an excellent Big Brother when the time comes.
I love your excited “stories” when I get home from work. I imagine that you are telling me all about your day – I can honestly say it’s the favorite time of mine, to hear you explaining what you saw on your walk at lunch, and which friends you sniffed, and where you found something good to roll in. It’s a nice transition into the home we all share, to have you throw a little parade for me to tell me your stories.
I love that you lie on the sofa in the evenings and snore so loudly that we have to turn the TV up, I love that there is a tiny bump at the top of your head (the Summit of the Basset Hound), and I love that you race around the house after a walk like it’s the most exciting thing that’s happened to ANYONE ALL DAY! I marvel at your ability to smell when I am making broccoli for dinner, and know to come and wait for the stump to be placed in your bowl. I love that you vanish on sunny days, and I find you on a beautifully made bed, with a cream quilt, sleeping in a patch of sunlight. I love that you appear to be utterly and completely exhausted all the time. It’s cute. I love that you fall over to sleep like you have been shot and that you sigh when you are upset. I love that I can trust you to hurt no one and that no one we have met feels at all afraid of you.
Don’t get me wrong, you are also a disgusting little creature. You have houndy smell to you, and you are an endless source of eye goop (which you EAT! Gross), stinky piles in the backyard, dirt, hair, drool and other nastiness, and you are perhaps the messiest water drinker EVER. You belch, a lot. You eat things I cannot even fathom, and turn every walk into a treasure hunt for discarded food, gum and cigarette butts (AKA Basset Buffet). But we love you, dude. You are our French Hunting Dog, and you give this house something we never knew was missing. I will tuck you in tonight and wish you happy puppy dreams.
Suspicious, as usual.
